Being aware of my choices

Submerged in my prison's depths of pain and dissatisfaction, I forgot that I could open the door and set myself free by making better choices. 

I've been with Eve and the serpent many times in the garden. Whenever I choose between good and evil, I decide whether to help or harm me. And most of the time, the choices feel as small and insignificant as eating an apple, but the impact can be devastating, especially if we choose the wrong things daily. 

Anytime we choose the enemy over the Lord, we harm ourselves in some way. The hurt may not show up immediately, but it compounds over time. It's hard to be in tremendous pain and realize it is a self-punishment for my actions.  

I have so many examples of this in my life. Some of them are so small that I overlook their importance. But I follow the enemy every time I do the opposite of what I know I should do. 

Satan is the one who steals our time. He is the one who beckons for me to sleep and skip my Bible reading time, skip my workout, my writing time, or eat foods that harm my body. The enemy wants us to watch over people's lives so much that we become jealous, discouraged, lazy, unmotivated, and unproductive. And then he wants us to claim that we are happy. 

I can see his work in my life when I read my Facebook memories. Some of my older posts were so negative. I was in total misery and pretending to enjoy it. 

Journaling has helped me to see what I'm thinking and be honest with myself. Sometimes pulling those negative thoughts out of my mind and putting them on paper is all I need to see and recognize the enemy. Once I am aware of him, I can make a better choice. 

Every day I need to ask God to help me see Satan and defeat him. 

Drifting through our days and barely getting by doesn't require much effort nor yield great results. It is like treading water and barely keeping our heads above the water. In that state, I don't have any accomplishments to feel good about, so I seek that feeling somewhere else. 

Shopping, eating junk food, scrolling social media, watching TV, or reading helps me. It gives me a sense of false pleasure. But it doesn't last long, so I need something else to help. That's why it's so easy to scroll one more time, eat one more thing, read one more page, watch a few more minutes, etc. 

However, the pleasure I get from working out, reading my Bible, creating content, walking, or writing is much better. It lasts longer and doesn't make me feel bad afterward. It fills me up instead of making me feel empty. 

When we don't spend time with the Lord, aligned with His purpose for us, we feel an emptiness that nothing else can fill. Trust me I've been trying to fill it the last few years with snacks and social media. I should have realized something was wrong when my thoughts centered around food and social media. But I didn't. 

I continued on the path of unfulfillment and self-sabotage for years because I didn't want to work hard and be uncomfortable. It was easier to lie to myself than it was for me to be honest and open my eyes to the truth. 

Today, I am so thankful for new beginnings. I'm grateful that God helped me to turn it all around. While I still do these things sometimes, now I know why I am doing them. There's a difference between using them occasionally to enhance our day and using them to avoid our day and our lives. 

Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

Have a beautiful day!

Candida 

Twenty years of writing, growing, and overcoming

It's been 20 years since I started writing. The tears stung my eyes as I typed that sentence. Oh, what a journey it has been with my Lord. When we started this process, I didn't know my reality of it all would be better than my dreams.

Yesterday, I had a photoshoot with my books. My son used his gift of photography to capture my gift of writing. As I looked at the pictures, I cried. When he was born, something inside of me changed. I wanted to be more and do more for him. I wanted to be a mom with a career he would one day be proud of. He was the reason I started searching for my purpose. 

My son, Cayden Sullivan
Photo by Samantha Blondell

It hit me as I sat there with my books and my son taking my pictures for a magazine to showcase me as an author. I did it!

Photo by Cayden Sullivan

When I started, I didn't know it would take 20 years to discover my true passion for writing and fully see my purpose. But I can see it now. 

I'm tired of fighting it and unintentionally sabotaging myself. I'm tired of playing small and believing the enemy as he tells me I'm not good enough to do this work. 

I am the perfect person to do this work. Why? Because God chose me. That's the only qualification I need. 

During this process, God has given me so many unexpected gifts. 

I love reading my Zippy books to kids. I love sharing my personal story with them and letting them share with me. I love encouraging them to be kind and to dream big. School visits are my favorite days. Even though I saw it in my dreams so many times, nothing prepared me for the gift of being there and experiencing it.

It's so special to connect with another person. My vulnerability with my scars and sharing my emotions have blessed me to connect with so many people. When our eyes connect and, for a moment, we understand each other's pain, it is such a special moment. It lets us both know that we are not alone. Underneath the scars and flesh, we are all the same. 

For so many years, the enemy isolated me and made me feel as if I was unworthy of love and friendship. But through my writing and speaking, God showed me that we all sometimes feel that way. We all have scars, heartaches, fears, insecurities, and trouble feeling good enough. 

While I've made money, received five-star reviews, and had my story featured in TV interviews, radio, newspapers, and magazines worldwide. My books hit the best sellers list on Amazon, and one of my books even won an award. Nothing, however, compares to helping someone who is in pain. 

I still remember the boy who hugged me and told me he was suicidal, but my story gave him the hope to keep going. That's why I do it all. I've been there. I've been in so much pain that I didn't know how to break free. God showed me the way. Now I want to spend the rest of my life helping others learn how to overcome their pain. 

Thank you, sweet friends, for reading my blogs, buying my books, and supporting me fully. You will never know how much your support means to me. 

I'm so thankful for every word I've written in the last 20 years and for the hands that have typed them. Each word has brought me closer to the person I want to become. 

Photo by Cayden Sullivan

Good things are on the horizon. I can feel it. 

Have a wonderful day! 

New Year, New Opportunities

It’s always exciting for me to start a new year. I love the opportunity to start over—with a new journal, the new list of goals, and as a new person. When the old year comes to an end, I am not the same person as I was when I started the year. In many ways, I’ve grown and changed and experienced so much more. Every obstacle and challenge has prepared me for the new year. Therefore, I want to do my part and do everything in my power to live the best life possible. 

I feel the best way for me to ringing in the new year is with prayer. I need God's guidance to be able to do what He wants me to do. The fact that I am alive means I still have a purpose. God is not finished with me yet, so I want to make sure that I am on the right course. When I evaluated my life in 2017, I was disappointed with myself. While I made progress in some areas of my life, I still know in my heart that I could have done better. Why? Because I did not give my all.

My focus word for 2018 is...success. My definition of success is showing up every day and giving my best effort—while doing the things that God wants me to do. I want to go to bed every night knowing that I gave everything that I had to give to that day. I want to know that I lived well, loved unconditionally, and used the gifts God gave me to make a difference in some life, in some way. I want to receive every day as a precious gift. I want to plan and use the most of it. I want to live intentionally, and take the time to love and be loved—instead of just aimlessly drifting through my day. I want to write more and share more of my life with you. 

At the end of this year, as I sit down to review my goals, I want to know that I gave my best effort toward accomplishing each one. The outcome isn’t as important to me as the effort. Because I know true success is when God blesses my efforts with His will. That’s when I can shine my light on Him and when I feel the most joy and peace in my heart. 

Do you have a word to focus on this year? I’d love to hear it and why you chose it. 

Happy New Year!

Candida

God Blesses Our Efforts

God wants a relationship with us. He wants to lead us and guide us along our life and He wants for us to live every day with purpose. Sometimes, however, we get confused about His role in our lives. God will not allow us to use Him or to take advantage of His grace and mercy. We can’t just live however we choose to live and expect God to bless us—according to our will. That’s not how it works.

For many years, I used prayer as a way to tell God what I wanted and then expected Him to give it to me. Now, however, I have learned to ask for His guidance. Then when God instructs me on what to do, I do it. That’s how my body healed. I didn’t just pray for healing, but I did everything that I could do to acquire it. I changed my diet, changed my lifestyle, reduced my stress, and exercised regularly. Then when I did everything in my power, God blessed my efforts. 

We can’t acquire more knowledge without reading our Bibles. We can’t obtain wisdom without hardships. When we bow our heads, show up every day, and pray for strength and guidance, then God will walk with us. He won’t do everything for us, but He will show us how to do things for ourselves.

If everything came natural and easy for us, then we wouldn't need God nor be appreciative of the blessings when they come into our lives. When things are hard, but we still manage to overcome them, then the blessing becomes greater to us because we attach a greater importance to it. 

For example, running is my nemesis. It is so incredibly hard for me because of the instability in my foot and pelvis. When I’m able to do it despite the hardships and challenges, then I feel so accomplished and strong. The enemy tries to defeat me every day. He continuously places snares in my way. He wants me to just give up and accept defeat—without even trying. God, however, wants me to give my life everything that I have to give. When I reach the end of my physical, emotional, and mental strength, then God will take over. My problem, however, is that I usually give up, when I still have so much left to give. I don’t persevere to the end of my strength. I quit and then expect God to just do it for me. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way. 

When we have a desire in our hearts to do something, then we need to do everything in our power to obtain the object of our desire. After all, God is the one who places the desire in our hearts. Each one has a purpose and will benefit our lives in some way. Sometimes we don’t always understand our desires. I certainly don’t understand my desire to run, when it is so physically challenging for my body, but I trust God to teach me through the process. Faith is taking the first step when we are unsure about the journey that awaits us.  One day I’m sure I will look back on the whole experience with a new understanding and be in owe of my Lord. He knows what we need when we don’t. We just have to trust Him. 

Yesterday, He blessed me to do something that I have never been able to do. I was able to run/walk six miles. While I wasn’t able to run the whole time, I pushed myself. And when I reached the end of my strength, I walked for a while. I didn’t just give up, but I completed the six miles—even though it was challenging. This morning my body is sore, but I have a victory that the enemy can’t take from me. Despite my circumstances, I was able to do something that I’ve never done before, and accomplish my goal. 

As I was trying to decide whether or not to do it yesterday, I had a thought that helped me to make up my mind. I would rather look back on an experience and know with absolute certainty that I couldn’t do it than to always wonder what would have happened if I had only tried. 

Love and blessings, 

Candida

What It's Like to Live With Scars

It’s hard to explain something that we've never experienced. We can research things and think we have an understanding of them, but until we have actually experienced them, we can’t even begin to understand the true feelings and emotions. When I first started writing, I heard over and over from other writers—write what you know. That’s why I try to write with sincere authenticity. It is my heart’s desire to give others a glimpse of my life and what it’s really like to live with scars. In doing so, I also reveal the mindset that it takes to overcome our circumstances. Most of the time, when I go beyond the surface, I write with tears. When I can feel it as I write it, then others can feel it when they read it. 

Most portrayals of scars are negative. Society can’t fathom that anyone would be able to accept and even be thankful for their scars. They try to portray differences as a grave sin and the person who bears the scars as a monster. That type of judgment breaks my heart. 

So let me tell you my story….

My mom may have struggled with my birth and my scars, but she never let me know that she was struggling. I attended public school, had friends (that I made on my own), and was forced to adapt to the school. No one gave me any extra help. My mom wouldn’t allow it. She knew I was capable of doing it all, therefore she forced me and the school to look beyond my scars and uncover my full potential. I was NEVER the special child or the different child—I was always just Candida. While there were a few kids who were mean to me, the majority of them loved and accepted me right away, and never even asked me what happened to me.  

Unconditional love drives out all shame. My family loves me unconditionally, therefore there is no shame. To insinuate that shame would be associated, just because a child or sibling is different, is heartbreaking, to say the least. My husband didn’t marry me because he felt sorry for me. He married me because he loves me. Every day he tells me that I am beautiful, and he makes me feel beautiful. Pity or shame has no part in our lives. In fact, he never even mentioned my scars before he married me. To date, he has never brought up the subject. My children follow in their daddy’s footsteps. They have never asked me about my scars. It just doesn’t matter.

Regardless of what some might think, I love and accept myself, as well as my scars. I am grateful that God blessed me to live. The enemy attacked me in the womb and my God intervened and blessed me to live.  Nothing is missing in my life. I am alive to love and be loved. I have everything that I need and sometimes my heart overflows with the abundance of it all. 

As long as people just focus on my scars, then they will never truly see me. Whenever I notice someone staring at me now, I just give them my best smile—the one that reaches my eyes and portrays kindness—and hope that they can see a little glimpse of God through me and my life. In God’s eyes, we are all the same. He loves us all unconditionally. And that is how He wants us to love others. As long as we look for the differences in others and constantly point them out, then we will never be able to see the person beyond the scars. 

If given the choice, I would not trade my scars. They have taught me so much about overcoming, perseverance, strength, compassion, and the love of God. These scars have given me wisdom that I wouldn’t have obtained otherwise; as well as a closer relationship with God. I have met people I wouldn’t have otherwise met, and developed immediate bonds with strangers through our experiences of pain. The hardships my scars cause me is not worthy to be compared to the joy. 

Love and blessings, 

Candida

4 Steps to Stop Drifting

Are you drifting through life? Or do you live every day with purpose and intention? It’s so incredibly easy to find ourselves on the path of drifting. Getting off course doesn’t happen all at once. It’s little small steps, off of the path to our best life, that gets us in trouble. Missing one Sunday of a church, snoozing one morning, eating one day of bad food, smoking one cigarette, trying drugs one time, and taking just one step in the wrong direction can totally change the course of our lives. When we finally realize what is happening to us, we are miles away from where we want to be—with no map to get to where we want to be.

Have you ever had a day totally get away from you? So many times, while I’m getting ready for bed, I wonder, where did this day go? What did I do today that made a difference in my life and the lives of others? What did I accomplish? If I don’t know, then there’s a good chance I spent my whole day drifting. Now it’s totally different if I intend to spend the day resting, lounging in my pajamas while reading a book. Because I planned the rest day. It’s living unintentionally that causes me heartache. 

I don’t want to reach the end of my life one day and realize that I drifted my whole life and never accomplished my dreams. In order to prevent this from happening to me, I’ve realized that I have to be intentional about my life. The enemy would love for me to spend my days on social media, watching TV, or ignoring my heart’s desires. When I’m constantly distracted, then I can’t serve God the way that I want and need to. Most things are fine in moderation, we just have to be sure that we are moderating our time and attention. 

1. If I want to reach my goals, then I have to be intentional about how I spend my days. Every day I have to live with purpose and avoid the busyness trap. Busyness is not the same as being productive. I could spend the whole day being busy and never really accomplish anything. The key is to schedule my days and make a list of at least three things that need to be completed that day, in order to move me closer to my dreams.
2. The art of mastering self-discipline is crucial to accomplishing my dreams. In order to feel my absolute best, then I need to do the following things: get enough sleep, get up at the same time each morning, stop snoozing, eat healthy nutritious food, exercise, spend time with God, have a positive mental attitude, and focus on doing work that matters. Since writing feeds my soul, I need to spend time writing every single day. 
3. Nurture the relationships that are important to me. When I start my day praying, reading my Bible, and meditating, then I develop a closer relationship with God. He eases my worries and helps me to establish my thoughts in Him. Spending time with my husband and children are also important. A few years ago, I realized that I could have all the success in the world, but if I destroyed my relationships with those most important to me in the process, then it wouldn’t truly be a successful, joyous life. So I am learning to establish a time to work as well as a time to play and enjoy my family. When I’m intentional about spending more time with my loved ones, then I find the time to make it happen. Also when I’m spending time with my loved ones, I put my phone down and enjoy the moment. 
4. Get rid of the relationships, habits, and environmental factors that are self-destructing. Procrastination is one of the biggest factors that cause me stress. Waiting until the last minute is a recipe for disaster. So is spending excess time with people who bring us down. 

When we take the necessary steps toward our goals and living our best life, then we will be able to eliminate most of the traps that derail our journey. Every day we just need to be conscious of our life and how we are living. Doing this will help us to accomplish more, become healthier, and have better relationships. We only get this one life—let’s make it extraordinary. 

Love and blessings, 

Candida

Breaking the Cycle

Sometimes we forget that we have a choice. This is our life. While circumstances might try to derail us or even destroy us, at the end of the day no one can take away the way we chose to see our lives. Ultimately, with every thought and action, we declare whether or not we are a victim of our circumstances or an overcomer of them.

Perspective is a beautiful gift. Especially when we ask God to give us the right lens upon which to view our lives. For so long, I wasted precious time crying over something that I could not change. When I changed my thoughts about the situation, however, my situation changed. Every day is a new canvas for us to paint the picture we wish to see in the world. We can be consumed with the evil and heartaches of the world, or we can choose to see the joy and love. It’s all around us. Whatever we focus on will manifest in our lives. 

We don’t have to wait for great things to happen in our lives to be happy. Right now, we can choose to see our situation with different eyes and a new understanding. When I am struggling with something, I like to ask God to help me see the situation as it is—not how I have chosen to see it. Most often our brains automatically jump to the worst-case scenario. It takes practice for us to learn to examine our thoughts and discard the lies. Once we replace the lies with the truth, then we are able to see the bigger picture.

Journaling helps me to see things with a different perspective. Just getting our thoughts on paper will help us to see them truthfully. When they are just in our head, then the devil has a way of magnifying them. Usually, by the time I write my problem out in detail, my feelings about the situation has already changed.

Most of the things I worry about never actually happen anyway. It is just problems that I create in my mind. I have a special talent for turning one little thought into a tragedy within minutes. Especially if I feed the fear and worry in my mind. To stop the tragedy from occurring in my mind, I tell myself that I will allow myself to worry about the problem when it actually happens—and not before then. When I recognize what I am doing, then I am able to stop it. 

We can’t change the past nor the future with worry. It is a waste of energy. Sometimes just stopping my thought pattern also helps. When I notice the repetitive thoughts going crazy in my mind, then I can stop it by reminding myself that I am worrying. Then I occupy my mind with something else. Scriptures are very comforting. When I meditate on a promise from my Lord, then my troubles don’t seem as overwhelming. 

John 14:27 (KJV)

27 Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

Love and blessings, 

Candida

Why We Need To Reprogram Our Minds

Have you ever spent the day with someone who is negative? When we are around negativity constantly, then it has a way of sneaking into our minds as well. I once worked at a facility where the majority of my coworkers complained and were often in a bad mood. Every time I opened the door and walked inside I could feel my mood changing. Their negativity brought me down. Going to work made me feel bad. It was then and there that I decided to become the kind of person who lifts others up, instead of tearing them down. Needless to say, I didn’t stay there for long. 

Now I am cautious of who I allow into my life. I want to surround myself with positive, encouraging people. If we don’t have those types of people in our lives, then we can read encouraging books. Every day we need to do something to fill up our cups. We can’t drink from an empty cup. When we give away our time, our love, and our energy without replenishing it in some way, then we will find ourselves overwhelmed and drained. 

Limiting beliefs have a way of sneaking into our minds. If we are not careful then we will start believing that our lives have limitations. After my surgery, when the pain in my hand was hard to deal with, I listened to encouraging words and hummed hymns. Because I knew that I was in a vulnerable state, I listened to the same inspirational video about overcoming every day until I believed the message in my heart.

 When I start my day by praying and reading my Bible, then I am replacing my thoughts with God’s word. The world is filled with heartache and pain, but God’s word is filled with peace and love. It reminds me to not let my heart be troubled or afraid. God has grace for our every need. We have nothing to fear. 

One of the things that I have learned to do is to examine my thoughts. Then I decide whether or not the thought is the truth or a lie. While I might feel like no one loves me at times, it is not the truth. In an effort to counteract the lie, I might make a list of all the people I know that truly love me. This helps me to reprogram my mind with the truth. Sometimes we just need to remind ourselves of the good in our lives. The world will constantly give us a hard time. 

Gratitude is one of the best ways to change our lives immediately. When we pause and feel gratitude for all of our blessings each day, then it turns what we have into enough. God loves hearing from us. It pleases Him when we pause to thank Him for our gifts—especially when we feel it in our soul. When I realized that I was going to have surgery to get a thumb, my heart was overjoyed. Randomly I would burst into tears and praise Him for the thumb I was going to get.

photo credit unsplash

When we constantly feed our minds God’s word, think about gratitude, and live in the present moment, then we are able to break free from the negativity. I’ve learned, it’s harder for me to have a conversation with the devil when I’m talking with the Lord. 

Philippians 4:8King James Version (KJV)

8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

My Health Plan

Did you know?

Inflammation is the root cause of many diseases. In fact, arthritis is really just inflammation of the joints. The same is true for heart disease. It is inflammation of the arteries. If we adopt a healthy diet and add in foods to help us eliminate inflammation, instead of consuming the foods that actually cause it, we will be able to dramatically boost our health. 

At one point, my whole body felt swollen. So I eliminated the top inflammation causing foods. I stopped eating dairy, corn or soybean oil, gluten, nitrates and cut back on processed food and sugar. Also, I don't eat fast food. If I do, I pay for it.

Then, I added in foods to help me fight inflammation. Turmeric is a spice: therefore, in my opinion, it is food. I take a supplement of 1,500 mg daily. Drinking a superfoods shake for breakfast has also helped me to add in more of the antioxidants that I need to fight the inflammation. I strive for 3 servings of vegetables, 2 servings of fruit, 4 servings of lean protein, and 1 serving of the good fat through avocados and nuts daily. I try to keep my complex carbohydrates to 2 servings daily. This is the best combination for me. 

If I eat dairy, too many carbs, and too much sugar, my body responds with inflammation. This causes me pain. I have learned the better that I eat, the better I will feel. 

With the weather changing, it is even harder for me to stay out of pain. The cold weather really affects my muscles. So I have to work harder to feel better. Yoga has become my best friend. I woke up yesterday morning with my sciatic nerve bothering me. It comes on suddenly. Before I went to work yesterday, I used a foam roller to work on my achy spots, and then I did yoga for pain relief. This morning I feel so much better. Sometimes we just have to experiment and find out what works for us. 

In the last few weeks so many of you have inquired about my health plan, and this is it. If you’d like to discuss it further or if you have questions, please let me know. It would be my pleasure to help you! <3

Love and blessings, 

Candida

Despite Your Circumstances

Regardless of what we do or don’t do, we will have to go through trials and tribulations. It’s part of life. While we don’t get to choose our hardships, we do get to decide how we are going to go through the trials. Are we going to give up at the first sign of trouble or are we going to keep getting up—despite how many times we get knocked down? 

In my experience of hardships, there are three steps to overcome any hardships. First, we must know why we want to overcome it. What is at stake for us if we don’t overcome it? When I was very sick and told that I was disabled, I realized that I had a choice. I could accept the doctor’s prognosis and believe that I would never get better or I could do everything in my power to get better. Thankfully, I chose the latter. 

This was my why when I was fighting to get better….

I want to live my life and plan my days based on what I want to do, rather than how I feel. I want to enjoy each day and be able to spend time with my kids doing fun things. Never again do I want a doctor to pat me on the shoulder and say, “ I’m sorry. There is nothing else we can do for you. We will keep you comfortable with pain meds.” Nor do I want to be told to sign up for disability to be able to feed my family because I am unable to work. Lying in the bed for months, I discovered the value of my health—and let me tell you, it is priceless. 

Next, in order for me to make the necessary changes, my pain of remaining in that state had to be greater than the pain it caused me to change. Once I raised my necessity to change, then I started looking for a plan to help me. It required me to work on my mindset, my physical body, and my spiritual relationship with God. 

Finally, once we know what we should be doing, then we must take consistent action. I went on a strict diet, adapted an exercise routine, starting reading self-help books, and spending more time praying and seeking God’s guidance. 

During the first few months, I had to constantly remind myself why I wanted to change. It was so hard. Not only is it difficult to change something about our lives, but the enemy always shows up to make it harder on us. He can’t make us quit, so he tries to persuade us to quit. 

With God’s help, however, we can overcome the trial as well as the enemy. When we decide to work on the person underneath it all, then we will develop the necessary skills to be able to overcome it. I believe the trials come into our lives to teach us things. Without them, we wouldn’t be able to grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord. 

Today, I encourage you to adopt the mindset of an overcomer. Regardless of this trial, you can overcome it. When we go through the hard times with the Lord, we get to see another degree of His love for us. I have faced many trials with my Lord, and He has never let me down. It might not always work out like I wanted it to, but it’s always for the best. 

Love and blessings, 

Candida

P.S. If you haven’t already, please check out my latest book by clicking here. Despite Your Circumstances shows us the power of the mind as it embraces a positive and thankful attitude, and demonstrates how to build a rich life filled with meaning and joy. The author uses seemingly impossible situations in her life to prove that you can be an overcomer despite your circumstances.

Stop Crying Over Spilled Milk

My day didn’t start off as planned. This morning, I got my coffee pot ready to brew as usual, but when I hit the button for it to brew it just beeped and did nothing else. So it’s 5 a.m. on a Monday morning, I have goals and projects to work on, and my coffee pot died. Thankfully, I had some single coffee packets that work like a tea bag, but it made me stop and think for a few minutes. A few days ago my washing machine tore up, along with my steam mop. 

What can I learn from all of this?

We never know what is coming our way. Things catch us unaware. When something like happens we have two choices, we can either a.) cry about what happened to us and allow it to stop us from moving forward, or b.) learn from the situation and find a way to overcome it. 

Living with Amniotic Band Syndrome has definitely taught me how to adapt to life, and modify as I go. Most things don’t go as planned. Life is always changing. Problems are always arising. If we get stuck in a fixed mindset and believe there is only one way to do something, then we trouble strikes we will feel helpless. If we program our mind, however, to focus on finding the solution rather than focusing on the problem, then we are able to move forward quickly. Without wasting too much time crying about spilled milk (or in my case a broken coffee pot), as the old saying goes. 

Worrying about things will not make it any better. We can sit around and think about all the troubles we have right now all of the troubles we’ve had in the past, and all of the troubles we might have in the future, but none of that will help us in any way. It just makes us feel like a victim. If we can train our minds to be grateful in all situations, then the trials and tribulations won’t harm us. 

The good news is that I get a new coffee pot today. What kind should I get? What is your favorite?

Love and blessings, 

Candida

How To Stop Worrying

Most of the things that we worry about will never happen. All it takes is one inkling of doubt or worry to kick our imagination into full force. We take a what-if-this-happens and turn it into a real problem. Before we realize what is happening, we are completely stressed out and nearly crippled with worry. The thing that truly amazes me is that I can make myself sick over a problem that hasn't even happened yet. 

When we feel ourselves going to the dark thoughts of worry and despair, then we need to stop and analyze our problem. Is it real? Is it true? Or is it a figment of our imagination? Writing down my problems help me to look at them from different perspectives. Especially if I ask myself the question, what is the worst thing that can happen? Once I write it all down and look at it from all angles, then I usually see that my problem is not as bad as I had originally thought. Sometimes looking at the facts also helps me to better search for a solution to my problem. If it’s within my power to take care of the problem, then I need to do what I can do to help myself. If it’s beyond my capabilities then I just need to turn it over to God and trust Him to take care of it for me. It is His pleasure to help us. 

In all situations, we need to remember. 

1. God knows our situation
2. He has a plan to help us.

I have spent so much of my time regretting my past and worrying about my future. None of those thoughts have helped me live better today. In fact, it just took away my enjoyment of today. This moment, I am in right now, will never come again. If I waste today thinking about yesterday or worrying about tomorrow, then I have wasted the precious gift of now. When I focus on enjoying this moment right now, then I’m not worried about what might happen to me or what has happened to me. 

God gives me the strength I need for today. He doesn’t give me what I might need for tomorrow. When tomorrow comes He will give me what I need to conquer it. The Bible tells us that we are more than conquers through our God. Yes, I will have struggles on this side. I will have pain and suffering, but nothing can separate me from my God. Nothing can prevent me from going to Heaven one day to live with my God forever. When I look at my life that way, then I have no worries. God will provide me with what I need for every moment. 

I used to worry about becoming disabled and not being able to work. Guess what? It happened. And I survived. Instead of giving up, I put all of my energy into healing my body, instead of worrying about the pain and sickness. Through God’s guidance, I changed my diet, changed my thoughts, and ultimately changed my life. Now my health is better than it has been in years. What I feared as something horrible turned out to be a blessing. 

God is with us today, and He will be with us tomorrow. We truly have nothing to fear. As the problems in our lives arise, He will be there to lead us and guide us. Of all the people in my life who have hurt me, I have hurt myself the most. I am my own worst enemy. If you want to read a previous article I wrote about it, you can read it here. 

Love and blessings, 

Candida

P.S. If you haven’t already, please check out my latest book by clicking here. Despite Your Circumstances shows us the power of the mind as it embraces a positive and thankful attitude, and demonstrates how to build a rich life filled with meaning and joy. The author uses seemingly impossible situations in her life to prove that you can be an overcomer despite your circumstances.

My Beautiful Disaster

Last week, the devil almost had me fooled into believing that I was not worthy to write. When he listed all of my faults and failures, I felt so unworthy to share my life with anyone. My life is certainly not perfect by any means. It’s a constant battle for me. Some days I win the battle and other days I feel as if I am barely hanging on. That is life. And why I need God.

Sharing my life to list my accomplishments, however, is not why I write. I fail at something daily. I constantly need guidance from God. It’s His wisdom, love, and the hope in my heart that I want to share. No one is perfect. We all have faults and failures, but God has grace for our every need. 

Regardless of what we do or don’t do, God will always love us. Nothing can separate us from His love. When we do the best that we can do, then God is satisfied with us. That’s all that He requires from us. He knows the battles that we face daily. 

The enemy can make our situation seem so hopeless. He will tell us that no one cares about us. Our problems are too big to be resolved. He will even tell us that God doesn’t love us. The word of God, however, disputes all his claims. 

Romans 8:37-39 KJV

37 Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us.

38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,

39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

If we do anything for the Lord, it will be despite the devil. The enemy is always lurking in the shadows seeking those he may devour. Every day we need to watch and pray for the wisdom and strength to overcome him. When we draw close to God, then He will draw close to us. God has the power to overcome the devil—every single time. God is our strength. 

We are all His children and He loves us unconditionally. He died for us before we were even born. God doesn’t have conditions on His love. He doesn’t love us today and then hate us tomorrow. He loves us at our best as well as our worst. 

When I write I want to share about the greatness of my God. He is worthy to be praised. Anything that I accomplish is through and by Him. If I write anything to touch someone’s heart it is only because God touched it in some way. I don’t have that kind of power. 

Sometimes I make a mess of things. I say or do things that I shouldn’t. I fail and make bad choices. The devil tells me that my life is a disaster and that I shouldn’t share it with anyone. My God, however, can take my life, all my faults, and failures, and somehow turn it into a beautiful disaster. He turns our heartaches into blessings. 

Love and blessings, 

Candida