The Outcast: How to Embrace Your Life and Your Dreams

We all feel left out at times. This illustration from Zippy and the Stripes of Courage resonates those feelings perfectly.

Somewhere along the way, we have been taught that we need to be like others and do things as they do them to be happy, accepted, loved, and successful. That statement, however, couldn’t be further from the truth.

Happiness, acceptance, love, and success all come from within. When we follow our heart and do the things which feed our soul, then we are able to achieve the greatest level of all of them. We need to remember that no one else has ever finished our purpose. That is why we are alive today. The world needs our gift.  

When I first started writing, I joined tons of online groups. People from all levels of experience and ambitions told me how to write a book. Instead of just giving suggestions, they specifically stated the dos and don’ts of writing. And they didn’t leave any room for creativity or big dreams.

Every post was so discouraging and negative. After awhile of hearing the negativity, I became very discouraged. The voices, of what I considered to be the experts, aligned with my inner critic and overwhelmed me. The words of my heart no longer had a voice because they were silenced beneath my self-doubts.

And I was miserable.

God doesn’t want me to take my gift and mimic someone else. He gave it to me to nurture and grow. Once I decided to write from my heart, wonderful things happened. People would approach me in the grocery store, send me emails, and tell me how my blogs or books had helped them. Through similar experiences we bonded and shared a connection. That’s what writing is for me—a connection with someone else.

It saddens my heart now, but I allowed others to delay my journey. Once my blog and books were doing well, the negativity poured in, too. People criticized my writing and I listened. The frequency of my blogs changed, until I nearly stopped.

Why did you start writing? Why do you want to write?

When I asked my heart these questions, my answer was the same as it has always been. I want to help others, give them hope, and perhaps a little glimpse of my God. I know what’s it like to feel hopeless and overwhelmed, and I don’t want anyone else to feel that way. As they sink into the horrible hole of depression and feel there is no way, I want to challenge their perspective and encourage them of a better day. And if I can only help one person, I want to help that one person with my whole heart. 

So I wrote myself a note of encouragement:

Don’t spend so much time listening to the negativity of the world. Tune into God’s word. Listen for His voice and instructions. Embrace His words of encouragement. Open the Bible and allow God to restore your soul. And when you feel inspired, use what you have learned to inspire others. You and God can do great things.

Whatever it is that you want to do, do it. Don't let anyone or anything steal your dreams. 

May God bless you,

Candida 

Release Day and the Writing Process

Today is the wonderful day that I get to share my book with the world. It’s exciting and scary, and reminds me of the day when my children  first went to school. Emotions, both happy and sad, accompany me. And God blesses me to remember the journey and celebrate His wonderful gift.

People ask me all of the time about my writing process. I’ve been asked to teach writing classes and critique manuscripts. Each time the opportunity is presented I always reply, “I can’t teach others to write books. I don’t have a clue what I’m doing.”

As the author of three published books, I’m sure they wonder about my statement. Perhaps it appears that I don’t want to help others or that I do have a secret I’m just not willing to share. I don’t know how my thoughts and feelings turn into a book, but I have decided to share my method.

It’s writing day. I have set aside the whole day to devote to my newest masterpiece. Before I create the next bestseller, I should probably check my email. Oh, I have new message on Facebook. Of course I need to check it. While I’m there I should probably scroll through my newsfeed, look at pictures, and interact with my family and friends for a moment. Then I see a status directed from Twitter, which reminds me to check my account. An hour later, I have successfully networked with all of my media sites.

Now, it’s time to write. I open my word document and stare at the blank screen. It intimidates me. I take a few deep breaths and reach for my coffee cup, only to find it empty. I go in search of a steaming cup of coffee only to realize the laundry is piled up. Well, I can definitely do laundry while I’m writing—it’s called multitasking. I throw the clothes in the washer, go back to my desk, look at the blank screen, and start typing.

Thirty minutes later, I delete everything recorded and decide to go to the bathroom, which reminds me I need to scrub my toilets. How could I possibly write a book when my toilets need to be cleaned? After that chore it completed, my clothes are ready for the dryer. When I sit back down in my chair, I realize it has been awhile since my email was checked. After I have successfully wasted another hour, the blank screen mocks me.

Then the realization that I don’t have a clue what I’m doing emerges, and I feel so incompetent. I don’t know how to write anything to help anyone. But that’s what I want to do—help others. So I try, and try, and then try again.

I pray and ask God to guide me. I want to write books to glorify Him. I listen for the still small voice that encourages me to write from my heart.

Inside of me is a story that no one else can write. It is mine and a gift from God. Our experiences, trials and tribulations, success and ability to defy the odds, are what inspires and encourages other hearts. I write with prayers and an abundance of tears, laughter and smiles. I record my thoughts and feelings, first for me, and then for others. I write many versions of the same book, and dig deep within myself until I feel there is nothing left for me to give.

I ask God to allow my book(s) to help at least one person, and the first person helped is always me. I learn from the process and from opening my heart and mind. Each time God rewards me with a beautiful gift for my efforts.  

He is a wonderful paymaster!

Today, I remember the struggle and joy of creating a book. While I don't know the exact formula, I’m so thankful God blesses me to write for Him and His glory.

Below, in bold letters, is my favorite part from “Zippy’s Big Difference”. The power and emotion in these words humble me. It reminds me we all have a purpose and a choice.

For a moment, Zippy wanted those black stripes. He wanted to be normal just like everyone else. But then he also wanted all of the beautiful things that God had planned, just for him.

I hope you will allow Zippy and I to share our story with you. I hope you will invite us into your home and heart. Most of all, I hope you will be inspired and blessed by the difference God put inside of you.