The Vision: How to Dream Big

Have you ever had this feeling inside of you that wanted more? In order to have more, we have to be willing to do more. This is usually what halts people in their tracks. If asked, most people would tell you that while they would love to follow their dreams, they just don’t have time. I can’t tell you the number of people who tell me this very thing on a regular basis. “I’d love to write a book, too, I just don’t have the time.” 

The truth is that we all have the exact hours, minutes, and even seconds in a day. Whatever is important to us, will get our attention. Everything else will get an excuse. 

What helped me to get started was more than a dream, it was a vision. In my mind, I thought about the process and how it would feel. I imagined holding my books in my hands, with children gathered around me. As I read my books to the children, I was brave. I was not afraid of public speaking or of someone seeing my scars. In my dream, I was confident, courageous, and I helped others.

Whenever I struggled to write, I would close my eyes and focus on the reasons why I wanted to write. The clearer my vision became the more I was able to do. And I learned to pray for guidance. 

Before we can reach our destination, we have to know where we want to go. Before we go on vacation, we know where we are going and approximately what time we will arrive. We even have directions to help us get there on time and without getting lost. It’s so important for us to develop a plan to help us achieve our goals as well. If not, we end up spending time and energy on things that are not important. 

If I get up every morning and know what I am going to do, and why I am doing it, then I’m able to do more. If I get up, however, without a plan, then I end up wasting my time. Then I get discouraged because I didn’t do anything to move me closer to my dreams. I can’t tell you the number of times that I have wasted my precious time and then wished that I could do it over. 

Since I know this is a problem for me, I take precautions to  prevent me from wasting my time. 

1. My morning is scheduled. In doing the same routine over and over, I have created a habit. This helps me to continue when my motivation ends.
2. Remind myself every day of my dreams. I don’t feel motivated every day. But the dream is my why. It’s the reason I do it anyway.
3. Give myself a deadline. In order to do more, I have to expect more from myself.The time frame is a great way to keep me focused. 

This is just a few of the ways that I work toward my vision. Don’t let your dreams die inside you. Give them life. Let me help. Answer these three questions on you’ll be on your way to accomplishing your dreams. 

1. What have you always wanted to do?
2. What brings joy to your life?
3. How can you help someone else?

P.S. One of my personal goals is that I want to live on the lake one day. Every morning, when I’m sleepy and I just want to go back to bed, I look at this picture from our vacation and it reminds me of my dreams. It’s the encouragement that I need to sit down and write. 

May God bless you and your journey!

Candida

How to Overcome the Heartache of Rejection

It happens to us all. We start a new adventure, whether it’s a business opportunity or a relationship, and things don’t go as planned. The feeling of failure overwhelms us and has us thinking unrealistically about our life. Somehow the sting of rejection has us holding hands and having long conversations with our negative voice. This combination is deadly for our confidence and feeling of self-worth. 

The sadness is natural. Something ended or never really had the chance to begin, and the process hurts. While we need to acknowledge our feelings, dwelling on the loss is not necessary. The sooner that we can adapt a new mind-set about the problem, the better. Dwelling on it and going into those dark places, where we put ourselves down, is not healthy or helpful to us in any way. We need to learn how to silence our negative voice with understanding and love. 

During these moments, we need to practice self-love and become our own best friend. As the negative thoughts race through our mind, we need to silence them with the truth. In a state of heartache and disappointment, we are vulnerable and our enemy knows this. He will pounce and use anything that he can find to hurt and harm us. It is important that we act immediately. The longer we spend conversing with the enemy, the harder it will be for us to break free of his control over us. Once the lies start creeping in, it’s hard to see the truth.

Whenever this happens to me, I go to the Lord. Spending time in prayer, reading His word, and listening for His voice comforts me. God is my safe haven. I know that when I seek Him with my whole heart, He will always be there for me. 

Next, I go for a walk. Walking helps me to see my situation with a new perspective. Especially if I am quiet and just listen. My mind has a way of finding a new perspective, if I will just listen. 

Finally, I realize that all things work to my benefit. Sometimes I try to open doors that are not in my best interest. When I can see that it’s not really rejection, but God’s protection, then I am able to accept the situation. God has a wonderful way of turning my heartaches into blessings.

God bless you!

Candida

Sugar: Is it really harmful to us?

Did you know that sugar is highly addictive? It is also responsible for various health problems. I didn’t really believe that it was dangerous to my health, until I stopped eating it for a while and then reintroduced it. 

When we had our homecoming at church, I allowed myself to eat whatever I wanted. My mom made gluten free chicken and dumplings just for me. I ate those, as well as sweet potato casserole, and hash brown casserole. I topped it all off by eating chocolate cake. Right away, I felt sick from the sugar overload. 

Even though I had just finished eating and was completely full, the craving for more carbs and sugar intensified. And I became so sleepy. So a few hours later, I ate another piece of cake (to make me feel better). At the time, my mouth was really dry and I just felt bad. By the time that I ate the third piece of cake several hours later, I felt sort of high. I was a little dizzy and all I wanted was more sugar. 

The effects the sugar had on me was scary. The next morning, I woke up craving more sugar. It was as if my body was begging for it. Instead of fixing the french toast that my body wanted, I made a chocolate vegan shake from Shakeology and added in peanut butter and banana. By the time that I finished my shake, my sugar cravings were gone and they didn’t reappear. But the whole process concerned me.

From the moment that I took the first bite, I felt as if I was out of control. It was a downhill spiral of being on a sugar high that resulted in me making bad choices. I ate more food in that one day, than I normally eat in several days.

This whole process opened my eyes. The enemy comes at us in many different ways. He wants to make us sick, and will use whatever vices that he can find to derail us. We need to watch and pray that we don’t fall into his traps. Below is several articles that further explain the harmful effects of too much sugar.

http://www.womenshealthmag.com/health/dangers-of-sugar

http://www.womenshealthmag.com/health/how-sugar-affects-the-body

https://draxe.com/sugar-addiction/

If you'd like to work with me on becoming healthier, send me an email to candidasullivan@yahoo.com. I will help you find a workout program, nutrition plan, and encourage you along the way. 

Have a wonderful day!

Candida

Why Patience is the Key to Success

How many times have we wanted to give up or have actually given up, when the blessings was right around the corner? It happens to us all. Most of the time we want instant gratification for our efforts. While that may occur occasionally, it usually takes time to see any fruits from our labors. Waiting and working, and believing that it will happen can be so difficult. But patience plays a big role in our success. 

It took me seven years to get published. During that time, I wanted to give up on many occasions. My mind struggled to believe in the process. In my heart, I knew that if I worked hard and did not faint, when times became hard, that God would bless my efforts. Still it wasn’t easy. A few times, it seemed hopeless and my mind encouraged me to give up—move onto something else that would actually be profitable. But my heart always had a tiny flicker of hope. 

It was that tiny spark of hope that helped me to continue going, when I really wanted to quit. Because when we do something of importance and value, we will struggle with the process. Our focus, however, needs to be on what we have to gain—if we don’t give up.

I had two books released on the same day. Even through the years of rejection, I continued to write and believe. And when the time was right, God blessed my efforts. He taught me so much about patience through the process of writing and waiting. The journey created a memory for me. Now when I’m struggling with something difficult, and it seems that it may never happen, I go back to that journey and remember how He took care of that situation for me. The memory gives me hope and renews my strength. 

It took me three years to write my book, Despite Your Circumstances. It took almost a year for me to write it. Then my publisher asked me to rewrite parts of it. And that process took another two years. I was so frustrated with the book that I wanted to rip up my contract and just forget about it. However, I finished it, and it won a Book of the Year Award. 

God wants us to be patient. Things will not always happen when we want them to, but when we persevere despite the obstacles and trials, God will reward our efforts. 

It’s the same way with a healthy lifestyle. We often start with big expectations, but when we don’t immediately get the results that we desire, we quit. If we would continue, however, and realize that it takes time and a daily effort, then we would be able to get the results that we want. 

When we are working toward a goal or waiting for a prayer to be answered, then we need to remember these three things. 

1. God always does what it best for us, even though we may not understand it at the time. 
2. Everything has an appointed time.
3. God is faithful.

Have a wonderful day!

Candida

How to Deal with Difficult People

Normally, our first reaction when someone does something to hurt or offend us is to fight. We go into our self-righteous mode and can only see one side of the story. When we only look at the situation from our viewpoint, then we fail to see the actual truth. 

Anytime that I yell or fight, it is because I am hurting inside. I have acted ridiculous over something completely silly before because I had suppressed my true emotion about something else. But at the time, the problem seemed huge and my reactions appeared logical. If only I had stepped back and examined the situation, then I would have been able to see the situation differently. Therefore, I would have reacted differently. 

When I’m stressed, grieving, hurt, tired, etc. everything appears worse than it actually is. This is when I make a mountain out of a molehill, as the old saying goes. I react to everything and everyone, without really pondering my actions or feelings. If I wake up mad, and don’t do anything to change my mood, then I will more than likely snap at everyone in my path. When we think, what is wrong with everyone else? Then that is generally a good indication that the problem is within us. 

I worked with a lady once who bullied everyone in the office. She tried to keep trouble stirred up continuously. It was as if she loved to fight. But then one day she came into the office badly beaten. Her husband often beat her. It broke my heart. In that moment, I stopped seeing her as just a bully, and was able to see that she hurting inside. Fighting was all she knew. Someone was mean to her, so she in turn was mean to everyone else. It’s a cycle and the only thing that will stop the cycle is love. 

When we learn to react out of love, instead of anger, then we will be able to make a difference in the lives of those who are hurting, as well as our own life. Instead of talking about them and treating them badly, we need to take them to the Lord in prayer. When we bow our heads and ask our Father to help them, then we will be able to break the cycle of bad behavior with love. When we offer kindness to the ones who treat us the worst, then we give them a little glimpse of our God. 

In the garden, as the soldiers were wrongfully arresting Jesus, Peter lifted his sword and cut off the ear of one of soldiers. Jesus told him not to fight. Then, He healed the soldier’s ear. Later, after they had beaten him, stabbed in the side, placed a crown of thorns on His head, and mocked Him, Jesus asked God to forgive them. 

Before we react to any situation, we need to ask ourselves a few questions:

1. Are you acting out of love?
2. Are your feelings true or are you making the situation worse than it actually is?
3. What does God say about your situation? Have you prayed?
4. Are you acting according to your beliefs?

When we teach ourselves to pause and evaluate our situation before we react, then we will learn to handle our trials and hardships better. We need to learn to guard our inner peace. Our enemy constantly puts stumbling blocks in our way. The only way that we can get around his devices without stumbling and falling, is if we allow God to lead us. 

Have a wonderful day!

Candida 

Are We Standing in Our Own Way?

We are often our own worst enemy. How many times have we prevented ourselves from taking a chance? From doing that thing we have always wanted to do? How many times do we feel stuck, and believe that there is honestly no other way?

Our negative voice can be loud and convincing. It screams and shouts at us constantly through out our day. Regardless of our situation, it always navigates toward the worst possible scenario. Not only does our mind usually paint us a picture of the worst thing that could happen, but it tries to convince us that the lies are in fact true. 

If we listen to the negative voice, we will soon believe that we are incapable of doing anything. In this state, we start thinking that we are not good enough. And that type of mind-set is what stands in our way of achieving our goals and living the life that we want to live.

Once I was sitting in my high chair as a baby, feeding myself. I was struggling, but persistent. As I continued to struggle, but eventually overcome, someone watching me spoke to my mom. She asked my mom how I was able to feed myself, with the condition of my hands. My mom replied, “No one has told her that she can’t do it. Therefore, she doesn’t realize that she’s not supposed to be able to do it.”

Wow! How true is that statement? So often we believe that we can’t do something based on our perspective. Therefore, if we believe ourselves unable to do something, then why should we even try? And the not trying is the reason why we can’t do it. Not because it was impossible. 

Words that we need to remove from our vocabulary immediately:

1. Can’t

2. Impossible

3. Unattainable

Anything that limits our beliefs needs to be removed from our lives. When we believe that we can’t do something, then we will have guaranteed failure. Because we end up sabotaging ourselves by not trying. 

If we believe that we can’t lose weight or become healthier because of a health condition that we have, and, as a result, we allow ourselves to eat whatever we want, then it is not the condition that prevents us from losing weight. It is our behavior. The same holds true for any situation. Anytime that we persist through an obstacle then we will eventually be able to overcome it. But if we quit or give up without any effort, then we have chosen failure. 

We are all capable of so much more than we believe. In order to reach our potential, however, we have to stop spending time with our enemy. Whenever, we are faced with a difficult situation we need to stop and ask ourselves a few questions. 

1. Is my God in control?
2. Can He handle my situation and show me how to overcome it? 
3. How will this trial help me?

Once we realize that God is in control, and we stop putting limitations on Him, then we will see our life begin to change. With God all things are possible.

Happy Monday!

Candida

The Power of Love

So often we put the key to our happiness in someone else’s pocket. We are constantly putting limitations and restrictions on ourselves. In many ways, love has turned into something unattainable in our mind. And so we allow ourselves to become bitter and angry and dismiss love as being non-existent in our lives. 

God never intended for us to feel this way. He displayed the ultimate form of love when He sent His son to die for us, so that we may have everlasting life. That is the greatest form of love ever shown. The day that I got saved was the absolute greatest day of my life. Love, pure and free, filled my soul. This exquisite love replaced my fear, heartache, and the deep void in my heart and soul. The great thing about this love is that it never goes away. God placed an abundance in my heart, and He wants me to freely give it to others. 

When we offer love continuously, to ourselves as well as others, we are truly living and aligned with God. In order to give it freely, however, we need to remove the strings attached to our love. We need to love unconditionally. When we place a list of strings attached to our love, then it isn’t really love at all.

Love has no score. 

When we commit to totally loving someone else, including ourselves, then we will not focus on their shortcomings. We all go through difficult seasons in our lives. When we see our loved ones (and ourselves) struggling, we need to pray for them and love them through the hard times. Getting mad and angry only creates more heartache. While love creates a safe place for us to grow and overcome the hardship.

Whenever we are faced with a difficult dilemma, we need to stop and ask ourselves a question. Am I responding with love or because of heartache? 

The habit of responding with unconditional love will change our thoughts and feelings. It will force us to make better decisions and stop judging others as well as ourselves. The more love we send out to others, the more love we generate in our own lives. We can live in fear, anger, jealousy, bitterness, or we can live in love and peace. 

I used to live in a prison of dislike and self-destruction. Once I accepted my scars, however, and learned to love myself, the pain ended. Now I am learning how to show myself love everyday, and extend my love out to others. 

A few ways we can show love every day to others as well as ourselves:

1. Hugs are a great way to show others we love them. Get into a daily routine of hugging those you love. 
2. Offer as many compliments as you can throughout the day. Instead of looking for the flaws in others (including ourselves), we need to train our minds to look for the good. 
3. Pray for those who are struggling. 
4. Offer encouraging words to someone who seems down. 
5. Tell someone something you love about them. 
6. Call, text, or send a letter to someone you’ve been thinking about. 
7. Forgive someone who hurt you.
8. Listen when someone is talking to you.
9. Be your own best friend.
10. Do something every day to nourish your soul.

Have a wonderful day!

Candida